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Looking at What We Don't Want to Face in Ourselves

March 8, 2022
by TammyS | For Seniors

Isn’t it strange that the feelings in ourselves we try to bury or do not want to look at, are the ones we need to address the most in order to know ourselves and become more self-aware in who we really are?  Running away from a memory or feelings that are bothering us, only keeps those feelings and memories alive in our subconscious.

Sadly, some people grow up in an extremely unstable atmosphere.  This could be due to alcohol or drug addiction, adultery, abuse, homelessness or other instability, divorce, racism, etc.   These uncontrollable situations that occur as we are growing up can play a huge role in our development.  They could spur a person on to never becoming addicted to drugs or alcohol. getting an education and/or a steady job so that they do not repeat traumas from their past, etc.  On the other hand, being subjected to a childhood filled with any of the above can send one down the wrong path, as it is said one only knows what he/she have learned from their parents or other caregivers. 

The best way to be able to have a productive life, free of addiction, abuse, etc. is to deal with our memories and feelings that we experience because of them.  Obviously, therapy is one method, but not everyone can afford professional therapy.  What can one do if that is the case?  There are many groups available for those dealing with addiction and abuse:

  • Alcoholics Anonymous
  • Al-Anon
  • AlaTeen
  • Narcotics Anonymous
  • Abuse and Domestic Violence Hotlines

The feelings that we try to bury are often those that, if dealt with, can make us stronger and more self-aware, if we are only willing to examine them.  A good first step for self-examination is to write down our feelings about something that is bothering us.  This can bring to light emotions or truths that we have been avoiding, possibly for years, and that are holding us back emotionally, spiritually, and/or physically.  These emotions may reflect exactly what it is that is troubling to us, or they could be simply a symbol of our distress, much the way our dreams are merely symbols of whatever is disturbing to us.  Writing down feelings is a safe way to begin exploring our subconscious and allow us to reread and explore that which we have put to paper. 

It may be that we have been the recipient or victim of our circumstances at some point in our lives.  Or, perhaps we have been the perpetrator in causing another person to have distress.  Either way, being honest and facing our truths is the first step in owning our problems.

Just remember that no matter how negative our thoughts or feelings about something may be, you are not alone.  Nearly everyone has similar feelings at one time or another and it is how we deal with them that will make the difference in our lives and allow us to come out happier and more self-aware.



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